The Importance of Speaking Authentically at Work
Recently I came across this Instagram reel making fun of corporate speak. And I thought, “Oh my god this is so funny. And for a moment I worried, do I sound like this?
Instagram Reel in which Dogmom Af makes fun of “The Corporate Accent.”
I’m going to be vulnerable for a moment here. Sometimes I feel out of touch. Especially as I get older, and the professional circles I’m a part of widen and change. I was taught to speak in a way that my audience can hear me, and I only recently began to question what that truly means.
Some younger colleagues and clients—those who might identify as Gen Z, seem to share qualities I envy: a deep comfort in their skin, a strong knowing of their minds, their wants, and needs, a clear vision of why our current state of being sucks.
I find these characteristics so admirable - it’s genuinely refreshing to work with people who are good at stating their boundaries and questioning long-standing norms that no longer make sense. But Gen Z also scares me - poking fun and sometimes criticizing the social norms I had to learn to survive and make it.
A small example: I’ve worked with Gen Z folks who very clearly state their boundaries when I ask them to hop on a call. While I love the candidness, I would be lying to say it didn’t surprise me.
A bigger example: While teaching recently, we were going over the importance of slowing down to let the audience digest your key points. One of my students pushed back, “But that’s not me. I am a fast talker. If I slow down, I’m not being authentic.” Rather than guessing what she meant by that, I said, “Can you share more?” She said that she felt her ideas could speak for themselves. That it shouldn’t matter how she delivers her message, as long as it’s true to her.
Over the past 20 years of teaching communication skills, now more than ever I sense tension when I recommend that to come across as confident, a speaker needs to think about eye contact, gestures, the rate of their delivery, or the volume of their voice. Of course, I didn’t make up these delivery skills. For generations, audiences have seen these attributes as signs of being able to trust what a speaker is saying.
And now a new generation is skeptical of old ways of doing things. So, you might think we are at a crossroads. An either/or situation. But why can’t it be both? I believe we can still be authentic and intentional. In my opinion, this young woman in the class can slow down to convey more thoughtfulness and credibility, while still bringing her personality to her presentation.
I can relate. I remember the first time I spoke at a large company in Silicon Valley. I was so excited to share my communication tips. A fellow teacher observed me on my first day and said “Whoa, Anne, you bring great energy. But you are talking really quickly. You know this material, but it’s the first time your audience is hearing it.” As soon as I got that feedback, I realized she was right. And while it felt strange at first to go more slowly, in a matter of months, it became second nature.
That’s me all the way to the left hosting a panel discussion.
My guess is that this rejection of speaking more slowly, speaking more loudly, making eye contact for longer, or whatever it is, is partially due to discomfort on the part of the communicator. Any time we try something new, it feels halted, unnatural, and uncomfortable, and it’s easier to say - forget it, let me do what I always do and… trust myself.
And that is my conclusion. There is no one way of speaking. I can share with the participants in my workshop and the clients I coach skills that when done well can help the audience focus, listen, and think about what has been said.
But deep down, with every generation, those who truly succeed, are those who dig down and ask themselves, “Do I trust myself?” We are all just trying to figure this out for ourselves.
Challenge: Next time you get feedback on something related to your communication skills - before rejecting it thinking “That’s not me,” ask yourself, is it possible to do both? Can I try this out in a way that feels authentic to me?
