Integrate Communication Skills into Your Daily Life
The other day, I helped a client of mine deliver a fantastic speech in front of hundreds of people. Over Zoom the next week, we debriefed, and she asked, So, now what? How do I keep these skills sharp?
Believe it or not, communication skills are not reserved for just polished client pitches or high-profile presentations. They include our daily interactions, from informal meetings to casual conversations with friends. When you practice communication skills in low-stakes situations and learn what works and doesn’t work for you, you prepare yourself to excel when the stakes are high.
If you have read James Clear's Atomic Habits, maybe you’re familiar with the idea that tiny, consistent changes can lead to remarkable results.
Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results
A great storyteller, James Clear shares how your daily habits can help you accomplish large goals.
Like exercising or reading, we improve our communication skills by putting conscious thought into it. Who our audience is, what we want to convey, and how we will say it. And over time, this intentional practice sets us up for when it really matters. Like that upcoming meeting, you have with your boss.
Here's how to use communication skills in your everyday life:
Pause Before You Speak: Before you talk, take a beat. Say to yourself, “What can I meaningfully contribute to this conversation?” Maybe you have news that you want to share, maybe you want to relate to the person standing in front of you, maybe you want to vent and you need a sympathetic ear. The more you know the reason why you feel the impulse to speak, the more you can be intentional about your communication - a hallmark of executive presence.
Consider Your Audience: Ask yourself, “What does your audience need or want to hear from me?” Does the person want all the details? Or is the person in a rush and needs just the lowdown? Is what I am saying resonating with them or are they just tolerating me? The more you think about your audience, the more you get out of your brain about what you want to say and into the brains of your listeners and what they are actually taking in. This tip is for anybody who is unlucky enough to sit next to someone on a long plane ride that just doesn’t seem to get the hint.
Structure Your Talking Points: How can you organize your talking points effectively? Learn more about structure with this video of ours. Some of our favorite structures include:
The Rule of Threes: Keep your talking points to no more than three.
The Problem Solver: Present a challenge, offer a solution, and discuss the benefits. This format is ideal for proposing changes or solutions.
The Timeline: Provide historical context, describe the current state, and outline future steps. Use this structure to explain processes or changes over time.
Give more specifics to create connection: In other words, tell stories. For example, my parents got back from a 2-week cruise through The Mediterranean. I asked, “How was it?” And my dad replied, “Your mom and I didn’t enjoy the food.” End of the conversation. But there are probably a hundred different stories of experiences they had, people they met, wrong turns they took that he could have shared instead of that one general statement. Learn more about stories with this video of ours.
Focus on Delivery: The way you talk is as important as what you say. Work on your confidence, pause and breathe between your talking points, listen to your tone of voice, and pay attention to your body language, pacing, and emphasis. These elements are crucial in every conversation, not just in formal presentations. The more you notice what you do in everyday conversations, the more you will be aware of what you are doing when the stakes are high.
Seek Feedback: Growth in communication skills is largely dependent on external input. Regularly solicit feedback from colleagues and peers. After team meetings, presentations, or even one-on-one conversations, ask for constructive criticism. This practice helps you identify areas for improvement and reinforces your commitment to becoming a better communicator.
Wrapping up, every day is a chance to improve your communication skills. Each conversation, big or small, is a step towards improvement. Keep it clear, concise, and audience-focused.
Me pretending not to be nervous right before a big presentation.
Remember, small, daily improvements are the key to long-term success. Start seeing every conversation as practice and soon, you'll not just be speaking, you'll be communicating with purpose and confidence.
